Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
