i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
