Non-Jews are for practice
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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