fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
