Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
