thus making me awesome and them whores
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
