Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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