Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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