A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
