i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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