I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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