Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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