It's like God shit irony all over that family
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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