member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
