There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
