Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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