when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
people are starting to question the shark bite story
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
