I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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