Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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