Its about making memories worth repressing
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
