brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I hate all girls vehemently.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
