Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you win again, gameday.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
