Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I think I am morally bankrupt
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
