that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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