her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
