at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
