Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
