Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
