i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Just cropdusted the office
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Randomize
