the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Randomize
