I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
