? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Randomize