She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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