So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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