You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
