I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
