We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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