508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
is that a dick in a sweater?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
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