I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
