We need to start having sex underwater more often.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize