whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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