omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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