I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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