You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Boobs are out for the taking
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
