I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
