do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Randomize