She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
