i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Who put my cat in the fridge?
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