dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
