they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
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