i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Randomize
