I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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